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THE BLOG! :) obviously, but also to a world of wonders and mysteries
that are to be unraveled because that's precisely what SHE (or rather
me,) is all about. if you know me, welcome to another side of me.
but if you don't know me, it's okay. i still welcome you into a world of me
and what happens. i'm not anywhere near perfect, but here is where
i share my experiences and learnings. hope you'll be blessed reading
my entries!
LOVE YOU!
Saturday, July 25, 2009

blogging from my phone again cause I'm on the road. busy busy even though it's already a saturday. had dance practice and stunts vetting this morning and then had lunch with the raggers at quite a late hour. decided that it would be useless to go for cg because I'd be so darn late, so yeah. I'm not there. to fellow cgmembers who read this blog, don't worry, I'm trying my best to hang on to whatever faith I have left. I think it's a skeptism thing at this moment because I'm not a very young Christian, just one who backslided before and never really found the strength to totally come back to God because of so many things that happened.

they say that bad things always happen to good people and I guess that's what happened to me. bad things happened, I backslided, and got exposed to the world and now, I can't really or rather, don't really want to let go. before, when I was young, I was a very strong Christian, one who served almost full time in almost every ministry. but I was sheltered from the evils of this world and when it came to a time where I lost everything and gained all knowledge, I didn't know what to do. it was like Adam and eve eating the fruit from the tree of knowledge of good and evil and found out that they were naked. they hid from God, but I ran from Him because it seemed like everything that I once believed in was a lie.

going back to a different church, I saw he lives of others and how they've changed, but I never belive that I can be like them cause I'm too screwed up already. I don't think God will save me anymore, but that's what I think. for me, it has to be proven before I will really believe again. I'm just waiting for that miracle to come one day. well, idk if I'll ever see it.

anyway, had a bit of time before giving tuition so I met Moses and went to bras barsah (however it's spelt) from hall. he was thinking of getting a tattoo and he took my angel idea. lols. so now he wants an angel on his left arm and then he added on that he would get another demon on his right arm - "angels and demons" anyone? hahas. I like being with him cause he's quite fun to talk to and of course, he's one of the rare gentlemen that are left on this earth. kay, maybe not gentlemanly, but he knows how to protect the opposite sex. meeting him tonight again to go to Chinatown to drink with his friends and then having an x-men marathon tomorrow night after the block BBQ. woots~

honestly, I can't wait for the BBQ tmr cause almost all the freshies will be there! anyway, I'm on the way to give tuition now so yeah. sighs. it's going to be another weekend burnt by hall activities, but this is the life! maybe I should get a hall boyfriend. so much easier than juggling a few outside hall. sighs. korie says I should go 6mths without a boyf, but hmm. with my personality, I'm too fun loving to not have one. lols. many people think I'm a playgirl, but I don't think I am. I just haven't found the right one. maybe I'm just the female version of YCS. he broke up with his ex barely three weeks ago and he's already got a new girl. I'm just, something like him?

no, I'm just looking for the right person to come along.