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THE BLOG! :) obviously, but also to a world of wonders and mysteries
that are to be unraveled because that's precisely what SHE (or rather
me,) is all about. if you know me, welcome to another side of me.
but if you don't know me, it's okay. i still welcome you into a world of me
and what happens. i'm not anywhere near perfect, but here is where
i share my experiences and learnings. hope you'll be blessed reading
my entries!
LOVE YOU!
Wednesday, April 29, 2009

somethings are changing, for good and for bad. somethings are getting easier to do, others harder. after putting someone down, i was telling QiaoQiao, i feel so much more freedom to do whatever i want, love whoever i want and really, just live myself, being who i really am. and after three years, the real me finally has a chance to come out and play. i know that the next one who comes along, will not only be better, but will also be someone who allows me to be who i am without complaining about me making up, my specs, my habits, whatever. love me for who i am boy, or don't love me at all. :)

found someone who seems to really know me inside out. knows what i'm thinking. encourages when i need it, without me even telling him anything. notices the small, really minute changes in me and on me. but i'm really afraid to think too much into this relationship because it's really so strong, yet so fragile. i don't know how to describe this relationship that we have. hahas. but, i guess i won't think too much because, it won't do any good. there's too much at stake right now between us, so i don't want to lose our friendship.

found another someone too. hahas. quiet, thoughtful. sweet, gentle. intelligent too. hahas. but seriously, we just met and i don't want to think too much. i'm just beginning to know him, but i have to admit, that he is really my type. actually both guys are, more than the gone and over him. both of them are tall, good built, somewhat sporty/athletic, actually shows that they care for me in practical ways instead of just saying that they do.

one thing to learn cb, sometimes, actions speak louder than words. i'm sorry. i know you've said you cared like three million times, but it's all just words. and in this world, words are actually worthless. like this blog, every single word that i type, is worthless. i can't make money from these words, all they are are just emptiness that reflect thoughts, wants, needs and deeds. and your words, are like this space too.

or maybe it's just me, i prefer seeing people acting on the "i care for you". it's called practical love. but i guess, that wasn't the way that the old guy worked. hahas. but for now, for me, i'm not wanting to get into a relationship anytime soon. seeing all my friends going into relationships, i don't envy them because they've all had privileges taken away from them - like no clubbing, no colourful clothes etc. i want to stay my colourful, happy bubble, clubber self for now.

single, looking, but not available yet.
nice. :)

been making loads of memories, but really no time to update. :( i'll update everything in a summary when i've got time. :))