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THE BLOG! :) obviously, but also to a world of wonders and mysteries
that are to be unraveled because that's precisely what SHE (or rather
me,) is all about. if you know me, welcome to another side of me.
but if you don't know me, it's okay. i still welcome you into a world of me
and what happens. i'm not anywhere near perfect, but here is where
i share my experiences and learnings. hope you'll be blessed reading
my entries!
LOVE YOU!
Wednesday, September 10, 2008

and so i went for my GeYao auditions yesterday and i kinda screwed it up really badly because of various reasons. actually the moment i stepped into the room my mind went "ohno!" because i saw this guy whom i always felt nervous around sitting there at the front most position if there's such a thing. and i totally freaked. when i was filling in my particulars, seriously, i almost couldn't write my own name. this was the first singing audition in my life and in chinese too. i totally don't understand. if i could sing in front of like 700plus people in Japan, to strangers in the bar, why couldn't i sing in a room with less than 10people. during the auditions, i screwed up by forgetting my lyrics. the people in the room were nice enough to feed me the lines when i totally forgot them. 

but the moment i walked out of the room, i totally got angry and sad with myself at the same time. really thank Joy for answering the phone like almost immediately when i called her. and Keith, i'm really sorry, i hope i didn't scare you, and thanks for the sms this morning. it really helped. =) yah, i cried like crap yesterday night. i tried not to, really i did. but at least there was Joy and Keith.

i realized later on that i actually put myself down alot of the time. i don't know why and i can't figure out why either. maybe it's because i don't have enough faith. maybe it's because i don't have enough confidence. but whatever it is, God, teach me to understand that i'll always be good enough because i'm already Yours.