today i probably made one of the wisest
yet, one of the hardest and saddest decisions
meeting the right guy for me was a real thrill
and it was something i looked forward to
because i'd be able to love and care for someone
and know that the same person
feels the same way about me
but as i was working through the night yesterday
i realized that it was not the first time that
i turned my phone off
i wasn't on MSN
i wasn't anywhere near civilization
because i was unreachable
for a full 24 hours.
and that, wouldn't be the last time either
given my more playful nature
i'd always be doing that
especially since i'll be going to university soon
and my essay load will increase
and i decided that it's not the time
to commit to someone else
committment is about being there for him
committment is about caring for him
committment is about loving him
committment is about solving problems together
but when i'm going to be unreachable
for at least 4 days a week
that's not committment
and right now my committment list
has God first
then studies second
then friends third
and family fourth
he'll never be in top 3
and that's not committment
but then i also learned something
not being by his side doesn't mean
i can't be his friend
not being by his side doesn't mean
that i don't care
not being by his side doesn't mean
that i have to go away
friend, maybe we'll give it a few more years
maybe by then you'll find someone better than me
and maybe i'll find someone who's better than you
let's just wait and see what God says ok.